christain
Member
It's the steel on the inside that counts.
Posts: 2,835
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Post by christain on Dec 28, 2017 6:45:03 GMT
So....just sitting idly by, waiting on my wife to return from Georgia, and had this thought. (If this is old crap, please excuse.)....If your wife/husband/girlfriend/boyfriend/significant other/whoever ....was a Medieval weapon,....what would they be??? I'll start-----My wife would be a 15thc. Warhammer. She's hard in the head, sharp in the tongue, beautifully built, and a pleasure to handle. Yee-uh. What 'bout y'all's loved one's? I created this topic for pure, good-hearted laughs....let's keep it that way. No ex-basher, please. Keep it friendly. Love you all, and hope you had the most wonderful Christmas!..... ......Chris
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Post by Jordan Williams on Dec 28, 2017 7:32:22 GMT
Now that's interesting. I will have this deep in mind no doubt lol.
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Post by William Swiger on Dec 28, 2017 10:40:14 GMT
My wife would be a castrating knife.
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Post by AndiTheBarvarian on Dec 28, 2017 10:50:21 GMT
Oh please allow ex-bashing, I have such a nice metaphor! (Of course I understand that no one wants to read tons of long term built up fury and hate vomited into such a thread)
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Post by Bryan Heff on Dec 28, 2017 12:27:31 GMT
My wife would be a stage blade. No edge, no point, no possibility of doing any damage or hurt anything because SAFE.
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Post by Verity on Dec 28, 2017 15:14:21 GMT
A jewel encrusted and gilted smallsword.
Petite, gorgeous, light, agile and deadly. 😊
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LeMal
Member
Posts: 1,100
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Post by LeMal on Dec 28, 2017 15:47:03 GMT
A CS Shamshir. Quite slim but beautifully curved. With a surprising durability, strong spine, and remarkably pointed when need be.
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Post by elbrittania39 on Dec 28, 2017 16:15:56 GMT
A flail. Wild, unpredictable, not for the faint of heart.
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christain
Member
It's the steel on the inside that counts.
Posts: 2,835
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Post by christain on Dec 28, 2017 16:23:04 GMT
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Post by Verity on Dec 28, 2017 16:40:36 GMT
Good answers, one and all. :D Verity, I think yours is the best. William Swiger---that's just ---I don't have words at the moment. But I do have some phantom pains in my lower regions. Come on, man---Any woman that would let her man have THAT MANY high-end weapons can't be all that bad. Sheesh. (rofl) (rofl) (rofl) i think it fits. 😊 y’all haven’t SEEN her... hehe...
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christain
Member
It's the steel on the inside that counts.
Posts: 2,835
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Post by christain on Dec 28, 2017 17:00:36 GMT
Well...I'm sure Mrs. Swiger is quite lovely. I may have painted a bad image of my wife here. She doesn't LOOK like a Warhammer, but she can pull one out of nowhere at a moment's notice. Don't believe me? Just try her...
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Post by Verity on Dec 28, 2017 17:23:32 GMT
Well...I'm sure Mrs. Swiger is quite lovely. I may have painted a bad image of my wife here. She doesn't LOOK like a Warhammer, but she can pull one out of nowhere at a moment's notice. Don't believe me? Just try her... :o i was talking about mine... lol I’ve never seen Bill’s wife
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Post by Gunnar Wolfgard on Dec 28, 2017 17:26:53 GMT
Well it wouldn't be anything sharp because I wouldn't want to cut my manhood off making love to her.
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christain
Member
It's the steel on the inside that counts.
Posts: 2,835
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Post by christain on Dec 28, 2017 17:59:40 GMT
10-4, Good buddy.
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Post by William Swiger on Dec 28, 2017 20:16:22 GMT
Have been married 30-something years. She is not a fan of my swords and thinks I should have only one.......... She really does not mention them too much anymore unless she is angry at me about something else.
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Post by Verity on Dec 28, 2017 21:04:59 GMT
Have been married 30-something years. She is not a fan of my swords and thinks I should have only one.......... She really does not mention them too much anymore unless she is angry at me about something else. ouch. Just makes me even MORE grateful of mine 😂
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christain
Member
It's the steel on the inside that counts.
Posts: 2,835
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Post by christain on Dec 28, 2017 21:55:57 GMT
Been married since I was 19, and I just turned 50. Not married to the same woman, mind you. My first was my first love, the second was a high-school sweetheart, and my third (current, and LAST) is my all-time keeper. An old fart like me won't do any better.
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Ifrit
Member
More edgy than a double edge sword
Posts: 3,284
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Post by Ifrit on Dec 29, 2017 6:27:39 GMT
But what if my significant other IS a medieval weapon? 😎
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Post by Gunnar Wolfgard on Dec 29, 2017 13:02:21 GMT
Been married since I was 19, and I just turned 50. Not married to the same woman, mind you. My first was my first love, the second was a high-school sweetheart, and my third (current, and LAST) is my all-time keeper. An old fart like me won't do any better. You're only 50 ? Heck you have enough time for another one. You're on a roll why stop now.
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christain
Member
It's the steel on the inside that counts.
Posts: 2,835
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Post by christain on Dec 29, 2017 13:53:21 GMT
Nope...The current one is quite sufficient. I've had my share of being a playboy. Too old and broke down to try anything new. Sorry ladies, but THIS ONE is most definitely OFF the market.
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