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Post by Deleted on Mar 11, 2009 8:37:34 GMT
Chuck Norris - haven't you been reading?
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Post by musicalpoo on Mar 11, 2009 9:21:32 GMT
wrong! The original idea for the longsword came to a man named Jesus while he was taking his daily ride on his dinosaur, named Rex.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 11, 2009 9:32:18 GMT
Ok, let's just leave Jesus out of this one, I mean ultimately everything comes from God (this includes the longsword) but religion has a tendency to cause issues greater than can be solved by even a longsword.
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Post by musicalpoo on Mar 11, 2009 9:57:12 GMT
I figured. I live in Utah, and I heavily considered whether it would be wise to include Jesus in a joke, but I though most people here would realize it's a joke. BTW, the longsword does in fact come from a fish
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SlayerofDarkness
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Post by SlayerofDarkness on Mar 11, 2009 15:23:47 GMT
WRONG! Actually, this weird ancient guy invented the longsword... I think his name was 'Fred Flintstone'? ;D -Slayer
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Post by Deleted on Mar 11, 2009 15:56:22 GMT
Actually I invented the longsword, although the very first one was made from the iron of a fallen meteor, beat out upon an anvil made of mithril whilst priests chanted over it. It was then quenched in a mixture of the blood of 100 virgins (what a waste I know) the blood of a black dragon and the silvered essence of a unicorn. Unfortunately I lost it shortly after the forging and haven't been able to find it since, I think an angel purloined it.
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Post by Dave(utilityslave) on Mar 11, 2009 19:20:16 GMT
Ok, let's just leave Jesus out of this one, I mean ultimately everything comes from God (this includes the longsword) but religion has a tendency to cause issues greater than can be solved by even a longsword. Wow BR, that's a loaded statement!
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Post by Deleted on Mar 11, 2009 20:27:22 GMT
It has been postulated that the only object ever used to trim Chuck Norris's beard aside from his own fist or roundhouse kick was a longsword.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 11, 2009 20:36:48 GMT
What are you people talking about?
Who created the longsword? You are all misguided!
It was the mighty longsword that created everything else!
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Post by Deleted on Mar 11, 2009 20:45:53 GMT
Mostly so it could have stuff to trim/knock-down/cut up?
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Post by Deleted on Mar 11, 2009 21:17:07 GMT
Indeed. :F
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SlayerofDarkness
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Post by SlayerofDarkness on Mar 11, 2009 23:18:13 GMT
AH HA! So if that is true (which it obviously is! ;D)... Then the longsword CREATED the katana!!! -Slayer
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Post by musicalpoo on Mar 11, 2009 23:20:11 GMT
the longsword ate to many beans one night and accidentally produced the katana. the Katana is the TRUE bastard sword (once again, just a joke, I don't mean to start a rivalry here)
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Post by kidcasanova on Mar 11, 2009 23:38:32 GMT
Stronghold 2. . . so if this hold was so strong why was it able to be knocked down with a sword? is this why we are on Stronghold 2? did stronghold 1 get knocked down with a sword? This inspires me! I made a parody of "Budweiser's Real Men Of Genius" commercials for the katana forum; I think it qualifies for this thread as well ;D : Budweiser presents, Real Men of Genius. Reeeal Men of Geeeenius!Today we salute you, Mr. Stronghold-Gets-Destroyed-By-A-Sword Guy. Mr. Stronghold-Gets-Destroyed-By-A-Sword Guuuuuy!While other guys made their castles out of rock, you laughed—after all, paper is so much cheaper! Got caaaastle at a discount!When Stronghold number one came down, you didn’t let that stop you as you built Stronghold number two—and upgraded to cardboard. Gonna stiiiiiill get it done cheaply!Your attackers laughed at you again and again as they chopped down your castle with longswords, making your castle the most popular stop for Vikings before they made the state of Minnesota. Gettin’ pooooopular with the raiders!So here's to you, Champion of The Budget Defensive Structure. Your decision to use low-grade materials to make the cheapest defensive building possible will set the trend for *centuries * of wasteful government spending on cheap, faulty materials with a short lifespan. Maybe one day you’ll cop a clue and use stones for your castle . . . if you live that long. Mr. Stronghold-Gets-Destroyed-By-A-Sword Guuuuuy!--Edward P.S. If anyone here hasn't heard the Budweiser "Real Men of Genius" commercials, here's one: Oh dear...this was PERFECT. I stop whatever I'm doing when those commercials come on the radio. ;D
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Post by musicalpoo on Mar 12, 2009 0:03:22 GMT
best one ever! seconded only by ecovolo's of course
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Post by Deleted on Mar 12, 2009 1:03:43 GMT
Ah,ok, so a medieval Texan 1st made Budweiser & while drinking it,THEN invented the Longsword...... & then came ribs on a metal pointy stick !! Got it ! next perpondering therorized question to adendemize........
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Post by Deleted on Mar 12, 2009 16:51:16 GMT
Beer...Texans...ribs on sticks...
I thill think it was some dude with a really nice beard.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 13, 2009 16:09:23 GMT
If anyone's ever played Age of Empires then you know, if you play as one of the Euro powers, one of the knight upgrades you can get are the Teutonic Knights; let me just say, you put together a couple of squadrons of Teutonic Knights and set them to attack any structure and you will see all those swords rise and fall to the clink of metallic clanging (sounds very tinny tho lol) and the structure will fall in short time. I think THEIR longswords were special, because you got +2 attack on buildings and stationary targets; I used mounted knights as quick strike cavalry- they were great for taking out defensive turrets and whatnot.
Huzzah! Or whatever. lol
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